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The Exhibition of Sexual Passion

and the Human Race

A Curatorial Proposal by Drew Matthew Francis Linne

Throughout history the human race has been known for its passion, at the levels of both society as a whole and as individuals within everyday activities. Roland Barthes, a twentieth century philosopher, once said, “What the public wants is the image of passion, not passion itself.” Passion is the word used for an intense emotion, something we are all guilty of, and which can always take form in an infinite number of ways.  It is a feeling that is brought upon by a desire or love of something, whether it be a passion for something like carpentry or quantum physics, or the love of adventure or the gentle touch of another soul.

The love of a human being is perhaps the most valued and most powerful of all emotions, but is it really something that every person wants or is capable of feeling?  Roland Barthes suggests that is indeed the case.  Even if we are capable, it seems apparent that as the years pass we continue to rely more on the presence of pornography, written erotica as well as arousing works of art for bringing upon sexual pleasure rather than one’s own lover. The enjoyment, and even the production of pornography has been frowned upon by “civilized” society since its conception. Now, because pornography is so readily available at the touch of a finger through the wonder that is the internet, I think people often forget that nudity and sex were once considered to be important aspects of both religion and art.

Artists around the world have been producing erotic artwork for thousands of years to satisfy the sexual desires of the public. This image of passion as a form of art would even be commissioned by wealthy government figures; who, although probably unaware, occasionally were chosen as the subjects. The erotic art genre is not lost in the contemporary world, but it is constantly going underground, becoming something that one would have to search out if the want arose, and then resurfacing again some years later when the world is more tolerant. Only in the past five decades or so has the genre grown more prominent again. Whether society acknowledges it or not, this change is more important than it has ever been. Because of the rapidly progressing advancement of our technology and the ease of keeping certain parts of one’s life private, I am not so sure that the genre of erotic art will ever go underground again.

As of yet, it is unclear whether or not the uprising of erotica is a progression or a regression. Not one individual has the knowledge or the right to say so, either way. But our growing need for sexual release seems to be tearing some of us apart. To me, it is not that the public does not want passion. What the public does want is what they do not have already. That is why erotica is so seductive. It is so attainable and yet so out of reach at the same time. Society’s desire for this sexual release is so ever-present in the media nowadays, for instance, in advertising, television shows, reality TV, and movies, it would be nearly impossible to avoid or deny, even if we wanted to. There is an importance in thinking about this because it is all around us. And like it or not, it is here to stay.

To aid in the thought process on this issue, I have selected and organized a series of erotic art that is to be shown at the Chicago Cultural Center. The Cultural Center is the perfect place to have a show of this kind because it is a free venue and accessible to anyone and everyone who wants to see it. Furthermore, the show will run for the whole month of July 2011, because not only can it be visited by Chicago residents, but tourists visiting the city will want to see the Cultural Center because it is free and easy to get to since it is in the downtown area. When a visitor walks into the first floor gallery, the first thing they will come upon is an ancient Greek krater by the potter and painter, Circle Lydos. It was painted with the images of mythical satyrs displaying their large, erect penises, and must be displayed behind a glass case in order to protect it from damaging fingers. Straight ahead on the far wall is the next piece of artwork, an erotic Japanese woodblock print by Katsushika Hokusai, with the other four artworks mounted along the gallery wall in a clockwise direction. Next is an oil painting of two women in bed by Gustave Courbet; then an oil painting of two men, this time by Édouard-Henri Avril; a graphite drawing of gay lovers by the artist known as Tom of Finland; and finally, a photograph of a man taken by Rick Day. Each piece I have chosen has its own place in the history of erotic art, and will hopefully help us to learn about our own fascination with it.

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1. Satyrs and a Maenad, Circle Lydos, 560-550 BCE, black figure painting on clay, 54cm wide, The National Archaeological Museum of Spain

The Greek vessel painting of Satyrs and a Maenad on one side of the krater is one of the earliest depictions of sexual acts, from the period of 560-550 BCE. Lydos’ image shows two mythical creatures called satyrs, which are woodland gods with a horse’s ears and tail. The satyr in the middle of the painting is shown masturbating his inhumanly large penis with both hands, while the other satyr is simply running with his erect penis flaunting ahead of him. They both appear to be chasing after the maenad, a type of woman who is associated with the Greek god of wine and merriment, Bacchus. All of this imagery has symbolism dealing with sex. The satyr, for one, was also a term used in reference to a man who has strong sexual desires. It might even be so that the mere presence of a maenad has thrown them into an uncontrollable sexual frenzy. However, Lydos did not always paint depictions of sexual scenarios. He was a prominent artist at his time who usually dealt with images of rituals and processions. Furthermore it is unclear as to the exact purpose of this particular vase painting. Most likely it could have been an educational object, a way of learning about certain creatures that were believed to exist, and perhaps that one was even encouraged to avoid. Usually a satyr is a mischievous character, but even so, Lydos’ version of the satyr may have influenced artists in later centuries to begin what is now known as erotica.

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2. Fukujuso (The Adonis Plant), Katsushika Hokusai, 1815, woodblock print, 25.8 x 39.8cm, private collection

Nineteenth century Japanese artist Katsushika Hokusai’s wood block print is another early form of erotica and is probably one of the first to employ the use of text. His print is in the same style as most Japanese prints, the figures being very simply rendered by a thin black outline and no shading, the hair of the man and the woman is in fine detail as usual, and the fabric of their robes has a colorful and precise two-dimensional pattern. The one striking difference is the explicit portrayal of what is most definitely a very passionate love-making session between a man and a woman. Nowadays text is very common in erotica since it has gone far beyond single framed images and ventured into a more elaborate story-telling form such as comic books and even full length novels. But centuries ago Western artists were not so straight-forward in revealing the underlying story to a piece of art, and the viewer usually had to make up his own mind as to the background of a particular drawing or painting. On the other hand, Chinese and Japanese artists see calligraphy as a form of art in itself, requiring rigid discipline and practice to get it right; and they often incorporated text into paintings and prints for the record of important historical events, so it seems all too likely that the idea of telling fiction with the combination of calligraphy and pictures started in East Asia. A translation of the text in The Adonis Plant reads like this: the man is saying to his lover, “This is the first time we’ve been able to really spend time together. My feelings have been building up for so long, I can barely contain myself.” This to which the woman replies, “I’ve thought about being with you a lot as well, and since I couldn’t bear it any longer I’ve finally managed to arrange it. Promise you’ll never abandon me.” In Japan, which is a typically conservative society, this type of art would be seen as something scandalous, especially because the text makes it clear that their is something forbidden about the love between these two individuals in the print. Furthermore, this idea reinforces the fact that erotica is often looked down upon because of negative connotations throughout our history.

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3. Le Sommeil’ (Sleep), Gustave Courbet, 1866, commissioned by Khalil Bey, oil painting, 135 x 200cm, City of Paris Museum of Fine Arts

The oil painting entitled Sleep, otherwise known as Les Dormeuses (The Sleepers), was painted by the revolutionary French artist, Gustave Courbet, in 1866 after being commissioned by an Islamic diplomat from Egypt named Khalil Bey. Unlike The Adonis Plant, Courbet’s paintings were less obvious in their subject matter, requiring the viewer to make inferences about its underlying meaning or story. At first glance, the relationship between the two women in the painting may appear to be innocent, but if one takes the time to really study the way they are lying with limbs intertwined, perhaps with what remains of a final embrace just before falling asleep; or the relaxed but intense, intimate expressions on their dreaming faces, it becomes clear that there must be more between these two women than what first meets the eye. Their skin is expertly painted as if it is actually soft to the touch, their naked bodies with an attractive layer of body fat. This was the ideal form of a woman in those times, for it meant that she was well-fed due to her status in the wealthy, upper class of society. This idea of wealth is shown by the lavishly decorated furniture, topped with delicately beautiful vases and a goblet, as well as an attractive and probably expensive bouquet of flowers in the corner behind a bed that is made in lush, comfortable looking sheets and blankets. There is even an undone necklace of pearls laying forgotten beneath the arm of the woman in the foreground. Although immensely different from the previous two artworks, and certainly more tame, there is still a definite sense of eroticism between these female lovers. Perhaps the fact that the eroticism is more of an undertone is simply evidence of a progression that 19th century realist painters like Courbet were striving for.

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4. Hadrian and Antinous in Egypt, Édouard-Henri Avril (Paul Avril), 1906, oil painting, 1 of 20 illustrations for De Figuris Veneris: A Manual of Classical Erotica by Friedrich Karl Forberg

Forty years after Courbet painted The Sleepers, another French painter by the name of Édouard-Henri Avril became well known as an illustrator of written erotica, under the pseudonym of Paul Avril. Late in his career he illustrated an educational book of historic sexual practices and positions (much like the still popular, ancient Sanskrit text, Kama Sutra). Titled, De Figuris Veneris, or On the Figures of Venus, it was written by the German classicist, Friedrich Karl Forberg. Avril’s illustrations continued the growing trend of pairing art alongside text, but his work is somewhat more unique because instead of accompanying stories, it was almost as if he was illustrating for a history text book. For example, Hadrian was an emperor of ancient Rome, and it was widely accepted in that time for a grown man to have sexual affairs with young people of both sexes; but it was a young man named Antinous who was thought to be most loved by Hadrian. Their liaison lasted right up until Antinous’ sudden, early and mysterious death, after which he was declared a deity by Emperor Hadrian. Although the act of sex between two men was considered normal in ancient Rome, the mere existence of homosexuality is still wildly controversial in contemporary society. Therefore, Avril’s contribution to erotic art is by far a significant progression for the early years of the 20th century. He smartly chose to protect his personal life from such dangers of controversy and criticism by using a pseudonym when he illustrated De Figuris Veneris. But the simple fact that he took the risk of painting scenes of graphic sexual intercourse, which would be published in copies––and even in five different languages––for anyone to see is still a major step forward in the world of erotica at that time.

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5. Untitled, Tom of Finland (Touko Laaksonen), 1975, graphite on paper, private collection of Dr. Stefan Thürmer

The man known as Tom of Finland, born Touko Laaksonen, was a renowned artist in the field of gay erotica and fetish art during the mid to late 20th century. His style was consistent throughout his career with the theme of the masculine gay man, who were always drawn very stylistically. For example, as seen in this graphite drawing from 1975, Tom draws his men with attractively muscular torsos, perfectly round buttocks, ruggedly handsome faces, and always endowed with impossibly enormous penises that can even be seen beneath the clothing in some of his tamer illustrations. Though the piece I have selected for this exhibition is nowhere near the same level as some of his most explicit scenes, it still serves its purpose well as a representation of his work. When looking at Tom’s artwork, one can easily read into the underlying emotions of even his most subtle drawings. The way he communicates the love, lust, and even the fear of his creations is impressive; his skills with photorealism, which he developed a liking for much later in his career, only emphasized his technical expertise while still following his strict stylistic code. For example, each highlight and shadow on the bare skin of the two men in my chosen piece is so realistic and believable that it could be mistaken for a photograph at first glance. Tom of Finland used his superior skills to influence and broaden the contemporary world of erotica into fully accepting the inclusion of gay culture into its realm.

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6. Players, Rick Day, 2008, collection of photography arranged as a coffee table book, published by Bruno Gmünder

In 1994, Rick Day entered through the doorway that was opened by Tom of Finland when he began his unplanned and successful career as a photographer. After purchasing his very first camera at the age of 28, Day started his career in the field of fashion photography. His success in the industry led to his photos’ publications in various magazines and other media. Once he had gained the freedom of choice, which is available to anyone who has enough money, Day moved on to following his true passion of photographing the toned, muscular bodies of athletes, super models, and even porn stars. His direction, capture and portrayal of what is thought of as the ideal male form in contemporary society is made to look effortless by Day, whose photos always have an air of superiority over his peers and competitors. With the omission of his fashion work, Day’s photographs typically feature either completely or partially nude men, always with impressively ripped, athletic physiques. One of the primary aspects of Day’s photography is his expert usage of high-contrast lighting techniques to outline and emphasize each and every muscle of his subjects. No matter how tame or how explicit the photo, one cannot deny the beauty of his transformation of an ordinary, flawed human being into an object of perfection and sexual desire. In his first coffee table book, Players, which was published by Bruno Gmünder in 2008, he ties over 200 of his photos together with a very simple theme. Tom of Finland, whose work always focused on the fetish of men in uniform, may have influenced Day’s theme of the fetishistic aspect of sports and athletes for Players. The photos in his book range from partially undressed models to images of full frontal nudity. All of Day’s subjects in the book are either real life athletes, or models and gay porn stars playing the role of an athlete. Furthermore, because Rick Day produces photos of living, breathing men for the effect of lust and sexual stimulation, he is bringing the modern erotica even closer to reality than it has ever been. This is such an important move, because finally the subject of sex is so openly present in our society that it can no longer be ignored or denied. I, for one, have the hope that this movement will aid people in learning to open up their minds and accept erotica as a part of our ever-changing world culture.

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Curator Biography

My name is Drew Matthew Francis Linne. I was born on July 1st, 1991 and was raised in Oak Park, Illinois; the first suburb immediately beyond the Western edge of Chicago. I was brought up by both my parents to be patient, tolerant, and over-all accepting of others and their differences, and I had a very happy childhood to thank them for. When I think about it, I realized I was gay when I was in sixth grade, but I did not have the courage or the motivation to come out of the closet until I was 17 and in my last year at Oak Park and River Forest High School. Once I got the courage to accept who I really was, I was finally able to be free, and I was happier than I had ever been. After I graduated I spent a year attending Triton Community College, six miles from home. Finally, in the fall of 2010 I was able to enroll at the Kansas City Art Institute, so I moved to Missouri and have since been living happily in a dormitory with my two roommates. The more time I spend at this school, the more I learn about all the diverse aspects and potential art has that I used to overlook. Now I am interested in curating this show because I believe erotica is a significant part of the gay community, and an important piece in the history of art and humanity as a whole.

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The preceding text is copyrighted by me, Drew Francis Linne. All artwork referenced in this paper is copyrighted by the artist or publisher, and is owned by the aforementioned museums, art collectors, or artists. I do not own or claim to own any of the artwork above.

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Over time, one idea that was conceived out of the depths of a mind, which has been long since removed from the status of “celebrity,” can still evolve, warp, transform, and continue to have a hidden influence over contemporary society. Whether that idea helps in shifting the world toward its original intention, or acts as a warning to venture in the opposite direction is completely unpredictable, and probably goes far beyond its idealizer’s own imagination. Despite what they may seem like at first glance, modern gay culture and fascist beliefs have a surprising amount of similar roots. For example, it is obvious that the word “faggot” is considered offensive to quite a few people in the gay community, but it is lesser known that the root of the word “fascism” in Italian is fascio, which can be translated as “fagot.” Even though these two words do not actually mean anything at all similar to each other, they can still be very easily mistaken. Likewise are the radical ideas involved in fascism, and the still controversial aspects of modern gay culture.

In 1933, Benito Mussolini published The Doctrine of Fascism, written by Giovanni Gentile in 1932. The Doctrine is the official text for Italian Fascism, which was influenced by the ideas of several philosophers throughout history. Like most philosophical essays and manifestos, The Doctrine is really just another brick of paper, thickly printed with words that the common man would rather not waste his time reading when he can more easily pick up Harry Potter or re-watch DVD episodes of Lost. But then again, The Doctrine was not written for the purpose of a simple, common man. It is not something that Gentile wrote with the expectations of his work becoming a part of The New York Times Best Seller List or to be used as the basis for a popular television show. No. The Doctrine is an intricate, societal blue-print, that would only be endorsed by a man like Benito Mussolini for the common good, and the benefit of all mankind. Even if that means there are a few sacrifices along the manufactured, asphalt express-way that leads to Utopia.

One of the main ideas behind fascism is the importance of unity. Mussolini believed strongly in the force-of-many working towards a common goal; specifically towards a brighter future for the nation. This is the most major theme throughout The Doctrine, and it reappears in different forms across nearly every page. The first statement of this is immediate, “Fascism sees in the world not only those superficial, material aspects in which man appears as an individual, standing by himself, self-centered, …instinctively urg[ing] him toward a life of selfish momentary pleasure” (Mussolini, 1). He then goes on to say that fascism focuses on the nation, and how a man serving his country leads to a higher life for the individual, only to be reached through self-sacrifice and sometimes even death. This easily goes along with the basic fascist lifestyle, which, according to Mussolini, is highly structured, un-emotional, and only worthwhile if that life is a constant struggle. “The Fascist disdains an ‘easy’ life” (2). Therefore, if life is not a constantly impending obstacle-course, then one is not fulfilling his duty to the nation and the whole, and must be leading a selfish and cowardly existence. This is the type of existence not tolerated in a fascist society.

Existence itself is not necessarily important in fascist beliefs, since the life force of the individual is only relevant as long as it benefits the group. “… [M]an is man only by virtue of the spiritual process to which he contributes as a member of the family, the social group, the nation…” writes Mussolini (2). Furthermore, according to his Doctrine, Mussolini communicates the relative insignificance of an individual’s unique beliefs compared to that of the State. Acceptance is dependent on this. If one simply does not agree with, opposes, or refuses to follow and support the ideals of his fascist nation, he will basically be shunned from society. In fascism, conformity is the key. On the one hand the individual is a piece of a larger whole that can be shed like dead skin if the need arises, but on the other hand Mussolini often argues that the individual is essential to the existence of the nation which would crumble without its faithful disciples. To make this point he states that “…Fascism stands for liberty, and for the only liberty worth having, the liberty of the State and of the individual within the State” (3). Even though he consistently reiterates the importance of the individual, the actual individuality that can exist in a fascist society is of the lowest form. He writes of acceptance of all cultures and races, and yet follows up by making statements about molding different ethnicities and cultures into a common form in both in spirit and body.

Continuing with this theme of a nation-wide mind-meld is his belief that fascism (although incredibly narrow and unwavering in its structure) “…sums up all the manifestations of the moral and intellectual life of man” (5). In other words, Mussolini believes that his form of thought is wide enough to encompass an entire society, despite every slight or drastic diversity of opinion among his fellow man. This form of thought is one that rejects peace, and encourages war as the means to reach a universal good that most common men could scarcely imagine. To support this, again, is the idea that a happy life for a true fascist is only attainable through the intense struggle of reaching toward the common good of the nation. But despite all of this required hardship, “[t]he Fascist accepts and loves life…” (8). Thus, another important theme of The Doctrine is the true happiness which forever lies beyond a halo of thorns. Especially in the sections reflecting on the spiritual aspects of mankind, Mussolini’s text reads very much like any religious or philosophical text throughout history. He re-enforces this comparison when he admits that “[n]o doctrine can boast absolute originality. It is always connected… with those which preceded it and those which will follow it” (13). Subsequently, Mussolini’s ideals behind fascism greatly influenced the life of the most famous mass-murderer of all time, Adolf Hitler.

About twenty years after The Doctrine of Fascism was published, Hitler had grown to such immense power and wrath that he sparked and ignited the second World War. Feeding enormously off of Mussolini’s ideas that the whole of society should be venturing towards the goal which he called “the common good,” Hitler sought to eliminate those groups which opposed his ideal society, and managed to succeed in the systematic murder of over 17 million innocents. This diabolical action would certainly re-enforce Mussolini’s philosophy that “[i]nactivity is death” (5). Hitler is most well-known for attempting the genocide of the Jewish people, but he also attempted the destruction of several other cultural populations including Poles, Roma, Soviet civilians, people with disabilities, and homosexuals.

It is ironic that one of Hitler’s greatest influences was The Doctrine of Fascism, which sees suicide as the coward’s escape from hardship, and yet he himself committed suicide to evade the Soviet forces and his imminent capture. But of course that was not the only point in Hitler’s career where his actions contradicted his philosophy. Throughout his reign he commissioned countless posters of Nazi propaganda to fuel his cause. Most of these depict a strong male figure, usual a soldier or worker of some kind, and these men are often shirtless and embracing one another in celebration of their service to their homeland. Although it was probably unintentional and possibly overlooked during the time in which they were used, an inhabitant of contemporary society cannot deny the quite obvious theme of homo-eroticism in several of these propaganda poster which were specifically designed to discourage any type of sexual, man-to-man affection. This just goes to show that despite how powerful one man or nation can be, their own ideals and goals will most likely fail to take hold if based on hatred and war. The world just simply cannot allow such un-balance and therefore something has to happen to even things out in the right direction.

Fortunately for the modern society, acts of hate have never reached as large scale a scale as were present during World War II. As the years pass, these more pacifistic ideals are continuously reflected in pop culture as society learns to evolve and accept those that are different. This is especially apparent in gay culture. Forty years ago it would probably be impossible to find any kind of story with a positive depiction of gay society, or even any representation at all. Even ten years ago it would have been rare to come across a prominent gay character in a television series or a movie. And then just in the past five years there has been an explosion of homosexual presence in main-stream pop culture.

It seems that in the entertainment area, society has passed a speed bump and is hopefully continuing over the speed limit towards a more peaceful mindset and an exceptionally more accepting world view. Themes of love and acceptance are particularly noticeable in primetime television shows like True Blood and Modern Family. Both shows are incredibly different basis of plot, with True Blood being primarily about the civil, social and political rights of vampires, and Modern Family focusing on the contemporary version of a typical family group, they each hold a very consistent and similar opinion when it comes to the acceptance of homosexuals and their lifestyles.

In True Blood, the character named, Lafayette, is a gay man. Many years ago that would be his label; it would be what his character is known for. But because of the way society has positively developed being homosexual is not his defining characteristic but is actually only one of many beautiful qualities that make up a very interesting and thought provoking character. Lafayette’s role on the show is a friend to most of the characters, and as the cook at the bar known as Merlotte’s which is one of the primary settings for the show and usually houses a good amount of the cast at one time. Since he works at Merlotte’s, he is able to interact with most of the characters in every episode, typically with a positive outcome in the plot, due to his criticism or advice. One might that think that his character would be obnoxious or even a nuisance to the story line, but the exclusion of Lafayette would be a sad loss indeed. Besides being a regular input in the other main characters’ lives, the bar environment allows Lafayette the opportunity to have interactions with minor characters and guest stars as well. His sexual identity is definitely not something that is being attempted to hide, but is right out there and occasional acts a catalyst for dramatic scenes that could even be seen as controversial at times.

There is one scene in the first season where a customer at the bar complains about his burger being “served with AIDS,” and he demands that someone else besides Lafayette be the preparer of his food. Lafayette, you could say, actually follows some of the values of fascism because he confronts the disgruntled customer instead of possibly hiding behind a strong, heterosexual male lead. He takes the fight when it comes to him, delivers it back at twice the force, and wins. The most triumphant thing about the scene, though, is the way in which he retaliates. After walking right up to their table, Lafayette shouts at the customer that had insulted him, saying that all of their burgers come with AIDS, and if he does not like it he can go eat somewhere else. Even if Lafayette had not won the fight, everyone else at the bar, including his co-workers and customers, were behind him with the kind of support and love that society should have reached centuries ago.

Following a similar theme as True Blood, but with a much different approach, is Modern Family. Modern Family is about a large group of extended family members and their interactions in day to day life. Two of the characters are Mitch and Cameron who are a gay couple who just adopted their first child; a daughter named Lily. The pair of them are a contemporary portrayal of a the family unit with parents of the same sex. This is a family dynamic that is more and more common these days, but in a lot of places it is still very controversial, even if that fact is no longer outspoken like how it used to be in Hitler’s days.

Another controversial issue that Modern Family does a wonderful job of tackling, is homophobia. Mitch and Cameron are not the kind of gay couple to try and hide their true relationship, but Mitch’s father who has known and accepted Mitch, since he was a child, is still slightly uncomfortable with the idea of his son being with another man. Over the first season this issue was touched upon occasionally, but they went for a new level of development of the topic in the most recent episode, which aired on October 6th, 2010. One of the focuses of the episode was Mitch’s discomfort with showing Cameron public displays of affection. It finally resolved in a scene at the end with the full cast when Mitch spilled the fact that his father had not shown him any real affection since he was a young boy, at which point he and his father hugged and kissed for the first time in thirty years.

One thing that must always come into consideration when analyzing particular themes of a television show, is the show’s target audience. Modern Family has a broad focus on homosexuality for a mainstream show on ABC primetime, which usually is not as risky with its subject matter. But because of the very recent awareness of discrimination and mistreatment of homosexuals, people have grown to be much more accepting, even if they are not yet completely comfortable with it.

Change takes time. When one thinks of how long the journey has been for women, African-Americans, or immigrants to travel the road towards equal treatment and equal rights, it is actually quite surprising how fast the acceptance of homosexuality seems to be spreading these days. Instead of hiding or trying to exterminate certain cultural minorities, like Mussolini or Hitler did, just to make the people who agree with you feel more secure about their way of life, people absolutely need to have more exposure to controversial issues like homosexuality.

In conclusion, fascist beliefs and modern homosexual culture are not really comparable even one bit. Mussolini’s Doctrine of Fascism was written over seventy years ago with the purpose of guiding a nation toward a utopian society. But this was a utopia that focused solely on the grand purpose of the nation and gave no room for spiritual or social growth, whatsoever, among the common man, or the outcast who is never even mentioned in the text. Sacrifice is no issue in fascism, and life is not valued except for the benefit of the whole. In gay culture the focus is love and acceptance. This all adds up to the point that over time most people will come to the conclusion that life is better when filled with beautiful, and even common emotions and ideals, rather than the thought of “greater good” which seems to always divide rather than unite.

I have been at the Kansas City Art Institute for more than a month now, and it’s been GREAT. I live on the “gender neutral” floor in the living center (that means it’s co-ed but there are also a few transgender students–really awesome) and I have met so many wonderful people. I have two roommates who are pretty awesome, and we get along great but we don’t really hang out at all outside of our room. I’m okay with that since I have made a lot of friends here–more than I ever had before actually.

In high school I just never really fit in anywhere. I bounced around from group to group with one constant friend that I had had since 3rd or 4th grade. Then in our senior year something went wrong between us (well, it had been going downhill for quite some time) and during winter break we stopped being friends. It was really terrible actually, but I won’t go into that. When he wasn’t my friend anymore I realized I had nothing to lose so I decided to come out of the closet via Facebook. Yup. I posted it in my status like this, “Drew Linne is coming out of the closet. Yes, that closet. He’s GAY GAY GAY.” Hahaha.

It was one of the best things I could’ve done for myself at that time in my life, and I made a whole bunch of new friends because I was finally being honest with myself and everyone around me. But one in particular has stayed my best friend ever since. Unfortunately right now I live in Missouri and she is studying abroad in Rome. I know right? She has it good.

But so do I. I may not be in Italy but I am having the time of my life! I was a complete wreck of nerves when I first got here–wondering who I would meet, who my future friends would be, how I would deal with being away from my family, etc., etc. One thing I knew is that I didn’t want to be the shy, un-noticed person that I was in middle school and high school. I wanted to meet people and be myself and no longer be afraid! I also didn’t want to immediately fall into a “safe” group of friends, so for the first week and a half (before we all knew each other) I ate with a different group of people at every meal.

By doing that I got a general idea of who I REALLY liked, who I knew I wouldn’t get along with, and who I couldn’t stand. Well, I guess I didn’t figure out who I can’t stand for a while longer. I know now, though. Hahaha.

Well, as it turned out, I DID fall into a group of friends, but I took my time with it and made sure I ended up with the best people for me. And they really ARE the BEST people. Some of the them are like the friends I had in high school. Others are the kinds of people that I wished I could be friends with in high school, and some are the kinds that I never thought I would be friends with in my life! But I love them all!!!

I have found my second family here, and I have never been happier. This is the environment that I belong in. Living and working with other artists. Learning new things, stepping out of my comfort zone, meeting people my age from around the country (and some from across the globe), and experiencing different points of view.

This is my life in the studio. This is where I belong. This is my home.

Much Love,

Drew Matthew Francis Linne

And I loved it!! So then I looked up more of their videos and found two more that I really enjoy. The first is for End Love:

Also, I have those same yellow pants that the one guy is wearing in End Love. And then this one is for  Here It Goes Again:

I was browsing Model Mayhem when I found this guy, Dillon McMahon, who has these f—ing beautiful tattoos in the exact style that I want to get.

What else can I say? Absolutely gorgeous. Thanks Dillon!

If you knew the people who wrote this, it would be even funnier.

But anyway, one of the first people I met and remembered the name of is this girl named Jennifer, from Texas. The reason I love Jennifer is because, even though I’ve only had like, two conversations with her, we had an assembly about diversity yesterday. Now, this assembly was kind-of awkward, interesting and sometimes downright depressing for all of us. The woman who led the event would have people who associate themselves with a particular group stand up at different times, and then as we were standing she would recite some sort of statistic about that particular group.

Now, she gave the option to all of us that we did not have to stand if it made us too uncomfortable, but I think most of us did it. Some examples of the groups she called out were Blacks/African-Americans, Asians/Pacific Islanders, people whose parents or grandparents immigrated to the U.S.A., LGBT students (that stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender for those of you who may not know the term), Hispanics/Latinos, people whose parents never graduated from college, people from low-income households, women, Jews, people of mixed-race, and… I think that might be all.

But anyway, like I said before, it seemed to be that most people stood up when asked. Then at the end we were asked to discuss what we thought of the exercise. Some people thought it was interesting, others found it to be intrusive, but most people (including myself) found it to be enlightening. Several people spoke, and I was very happy with one guy who commended everyone who stood up as part of the LGBT community, and he called us courageous for doing so. But the reason I love Jennifer is because she stood up and said very clearly (something along the lines of), “I just want everyone to know that we are all bolted down to this Earth whether we like it or not, and I love you all.”

I instantly felt the urge to run over to her and give her a great big hug, but I was all sweaty and stinky from playing frisbee earlier. Instead we all clapped and cheered and whistled with each other, in celebration of our differences… and maybe even more so, our similarities that maybe none of us knew existed.

Much love to all of you,

Drew Matthew Francis Linne

Well, I have no idea in what order these dreams occurred, but one of the first things I remember was cutting off my left index-finger with a dull knife, and everyone was extremely impressed with me for that accomplishment. There was another part with an incredibly tall toilet, so I had to walk up a short flight of stairs in order to sit on it. Then I was in my friend Tim’s house (but it wasn’t his real house), and I guess I was staying with his family or something cuz I think I had my own bedroom. Anyway, Tim’s sister was Katara from Avatar: The Last Airbender (the cartoon, not the shitty movie), and someone else there was a boy from Ohio who had a loud mouth and kept insulting everyone and everything. Unfortunately whenever he spoke out, people thought that I was the one being a douche. So in one instance, Ohio-Boy was shouting about something horrible and Tim’s brother Charlie burst through the door and grabbed me by the shirt collar, telling me to shut up OR ELSE.

That’s as much as I can remember.

NOWHERE BOY: A movie about John Lennon’s teenage years around when he meets Paul McCartney: This movie was good, and worth the watch.

DAYBREAKERS: A movie about a whole world populated by vampires and they are running out of humans for blood: This movie was entertaining, but really dumb. I won’t be watching it again.

ONDINE: A movie about a fisherman who catches a mysterious woman in his net: I loved this movie and I would definitely watch it more than once.

Anyway, when we landed in Dublin it was fun because I got to walk down the stairs onto the tarmac surrounded by lovely Irish scenery. I really always wanted to walk out onto the tarmac (now I’m kind of over the excitement behind that since over that week I was able to do it several more times…).

After we collected our luggage we met with our Irish relatives, Moya and Kevin. Moya is some sort of cousin of  mine and she’s around my parents age I think, and Kevin is her husband. I had never met them before since they hadn’t been to America since before I was born. However, they had met my mom and all her sisters, my dad, my cousin, and my brother and sister when they have all been to Ireland at different times. Anyway, we found our rental car after a great deal of searching through the parking garage (they rental agency told us it was green but it was more of a silvery color that only barely looked green and you could only tell in bright sunlight) and were on our way north to Lurgan where they live. Along the way we visited New Grange which is an ancient, giant mound of earth that was used for some sort of ritual stuff, but no one is sure why exactly it’s there.

It was pretty cool though. You are aloud to go inside but you can’t take any pictures, but the cool thing is that on the winter solstice the sunrise shoots a beam of light into the chamber and entirely illuminates it (otherwise it’s pitch black). There’s a super long wait list to visit it on that day.

After that we drove to an old cemetery called Monester Boyce (I think…). It had a bunch of ruins and old celtic crosses and tombs and a cool old watch tower that was used by the monks.

That was the end of sight-seeing for day 1, cuz then we headed up to Lurgan to stay at the Devine’s farm. Moya and Kevin led us their of course, and Fankie and I definitely slept in the car on the long drive there. The scenery beyond the car windows was amazing though, and I wish I hadn’t wanted to sleep so much whenever we were driving around but I couldn’t help it. Travel is exhausting.

Lurgan is a small town in Northern Ireland, and the Devine’s farm is on the edge of it I guess. Their house was really nice and comfy and we watched a lot of the World Cup while we were staying with them. On the first night I met my cousins Kevin and Niamh (it’s Gaelic and pronounced like Neeve). It was wonderful to finally meet them! I love you guys!!

Alright, well that’s it for day 1 I think. I’ll continue with this tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Well a few days ago Blu came out with another short called “Big Bang Big Boom.” You better watch it below (cuz it is frickin’ cool).